Can’t have enough

Photograph : Pexels

I just cant seem to have enough of you

No matter how much I keep starring at you

I just can’t seem to have enough of you

No matter how much I keep watching you

I just can’t seem to have enough of you

No matter how much I find ways to not like you

I just can’t seem to have enough you

No matter how much I don’t want to exist without you

No! No! I just can’t seem to have enough

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Hello August

Photograph :  Pexels

Hello August, you number eight the month of fall
Waiting to experience you in places with seasons
The orchestra of colors you bring out is fabulous
Many at home celebrate you in all sorts of ways

Hello August bring on the best you have for me
Give me something better than that from July
I will not speak of September but that’s in my heart
So come on make this month a memorable one

The Rejection Game

“No” she said when she was conceived her your womb
“No” he said when he realized she was with child
The first glimpse of rejection you both introduced to her
But she forgives you both as that is something she must do
“You’re not able to do this”, “Don’t be silly you’ cant’
“Don’t”, “No”, “You can’t do that”, “Listen when we tell you”
These were the words you pushed down on her
She had no clue what life would unfold for her
Strict rules around the house with severe punishments 
She was so afraid of him, so much so, more than she should
She probably thought if he was like this God must be a tyrant
Fear was instilled even before she learn’t her A,B,C’s
Life went on this way until one fine day arrived someone new
A little baby boy - She looked at him and said “You’re my brother”
She adored him and loved him with every beat in her heart
Not knowing that she was on level 2 in the game of rejection
Time went by and the discrimination grew larger than life
“No, you can’t cos you are a girl”, “yes, he can. He’s a boy”
Bicycles were denied, Swimming lessons were denied
“Learn to play the piano” she was told so she did
Years kept going and she had no clue why her sexuality was a concern
She began to hate herself for being a girl & very soon a woman
Her mother never taught her anything about the ways of life
She did’t know whom to ask – She found things on her own
A few more years gone by and now she started questioning
They didn’t approve her questioning their authority
She was seen as a rebellious teenager- a difficult child
In her mind she was strong and loyal, a beautiful mind
She did everything she was asked to do and time flew by
Many things came and went by, in her colorful life
One day drew near when she had a revelation so true
All these memories of a miserable childhood she lived
The spirit within her rose up one fine day into new heights
All these questions she ever had about her life unraveled
In her heart she knew she was a lover, an adventurer, a dreamer
She had become that being - survival to fight rejection
The spirit within her told her after decades gone by
The secrets which was never told to her before
She knew at once she was not wanted or needed
By the ones that birthed her and gave her life
She was perhaps not the boy child they wanted
She was perhaps conceived when they were not ready
Yet the first rules out the latter as she learns
That even if she was the fifth she would still be rejected
She yearns to find out from her that gave her birth
But she has enough wisdom not to do so as she’d want
Rejection is such a powerful force in life she knows
She realized that rejection = hate and there is no way out
To all who have been rejected at some point in your life
Just know that one may reject you but another will love you
For who you are and what you are and what you have become
Love covers all and only love from the heart can make you whole
Forgive, Hard to forget its true but try and Move On
We have only one life to live here on earth so make it count
Game Over - Rejection!

The Thorns

As it states in the parable of the sower, I’ve pondered a little further on the area where the seeds fell among the thorns.

The thorns depicts the anxiety, worries, cares, riches and pleasures of life. The seeds that fell among the thorns did take root and grow to a certain extent. Unlike the ones that fell by the way side or on the rocky ground, we know that these seeds did burst into life. young saplings. However, it could grow only for a certain time.

I suppose there are only 02 ways that such a plant could survive.

  1. The plant has to be strong enough to outgrow the thorns.
  2. The thorns should be removed by an external force.

I’d start with the latter, where it would be the easiest thing to do. Somehow the thorns should be removed or at least trimmed off by an external source. This would assist the plant to outgrow the thorns to a certain extent. Depending on the type of plant which would grow into a tree the thorns will become insignificant over time.

Looking at the first option, I find it hard to see how this could happen. The plant would require adequate personal space to grow, expand its branches etc. I’d like think that the thorns could be a blessing for a while where it may protect the sapling of strong winds and extreme weather. But then again, the thorns may prick and damage the young plant contributing to its slow death.

Looking at the options available by my limited human thinking capacity, I am led to believe this;

That if an external source does not contribute towards destroying the thorns or uprooting the plant from its current context and replanting the sapling, it would seem impossible for the young plant to survive among the thorns – ultimately leading it to death.

Live.Forever.Young

I don’t know about you but I am a huge fan of the pop music from the 80’s and this is one one those songs that will stay on with me for a long long time.

Forever Young by Alphaville.

I’ve not made any comments about the Band itself, to be honest I don’t follow them anymore. But this song has got me hooked on to it since my early teens back in the 90’s.

The lyrics of the song are wierd in a good way. Many may not connect with the lyrics but there is some truth to it.

My favourite verse:

Forever Young – Alphaville

Do check out the song. Try and listen without checking out the video. Read the lyrics too. The tune is vibrant but haunting.

I am not the only One!

I know I am not the only one in this world to feel the way I do

My mind is like a production house with all kinds of concepts floating

Be it baking, photography, writing or travel thoughts overloading

All the time, sometimes I just cannot seem to be sleeping.

I know I am not the only one in this world to have these thoughts

Of breaking in to a vault at a bank to discover special expensive items

Its not about stealing or anything, its just about the planning and execution

Its a harsh thought I know, but times are tough my friend.

I know I am not the only one in this world to do what I do

Wanting to show such compassion to even the most cruel being

You may call that your enemey but I’d like to do something

To see that life transformed into something splendid.

I am not the only one whose ridden with feelings, thoughts and deeds

I know there is another you out there – somehwhere

So if that is you reading this post – please leave me note

Last trip for 2018!

From 25th – 27th December accompanied by my husband Jude and some other friends, we decided to do a trip around the Knuckels Mountain Range in Sri Lanka. This was mostly to chase waterfalls.

Thanks to the main man who organized the trip we managed to stay in some bungalows owned by The Sri Lanka State Plantation Corporation in the Hagalla.

Our modes of travel were by 4WD’s; other options would probably be only via Motorbikes, jeeps, vans or tuk tuks. Though plagued with leech bites we all did have a really good time up there in the Knuckles Range.

Some of the waterfalls area below. Saree Ella Falls, Jodu Ella Falls, Girindi Ella Falls, Thaliya Wetuna Ella Falls, Lebanon 1 Falls etc.

The best time to see waterfalls in Sri Lanka is during November to January where rains feed into the waterways and you could experience luscious waterfalls. Be prepared with rain cover and leach protection and never remove leeches if they are already hooked on to your skin. Just let them have thier fill and they will fall off. Then spit on a fresh leaf and just place it on the bite. The locals use a vareity of things ranging from dettol, salt, soap water to get the leeches of thier skin. Also recommended to apply a local balm called siddhalepa.

Its highly recommended to take a guide with you when hiking the knuckles range. By doing so you could save yourself from getting lost or facing imminent danger. Be careful when treading on waterways of waterfalls.

Chasing Time

We all have dreams big or small, simple or complicated – still they are all dreams

We all have goals we would like to acheive in our life time

Whether pratical or not some even unrealistic in the eyes of others

It doesnt matter what others think or say about your dreams and goals

It is upto to you to work at it and reach out!

For someone us who have been trying to do so all our lives

A year or two, a decade or more has just by  with time

It now feels like we are chasing time as we are running out of time

It looks just like the grass and plants that wither over time!

Quaint Place – Idalgashinne

This unusual name on the train route from Colombo to Badulla caught my eye few weeks ago as I was just dreaming of a small holiday to get away and enjoy the weekend at a quaint little place – Idalgashinne.

It is a little town in the rail route between Ohiya and Haputale.

Srilankan railroutes are very scenic, especially those that travel via the luscious mountains of Sri Lanka with beautiful tea plantations and thick forests with surprising waterfalls. It is a must for any visitor who plans a holiday in Sri Lanka.

Well, I did not book the train in advance and then ended up going via jeep. The road to the litttle bunglow is quite rough at the last few km’s.

I had company and my friend was a capable driver we managed to get to our location before just after dark . I would advise you to take the train as a car cannot tread these last bits of the road and a good 4WD may cost you a fortune.

So after weeks of desiring to get there I did finally make it there. It was too dark to see anything by the time I reached there. However, I woke up to a glorious sunrise with clouds just lingering in the lower mountains and clear skies above bringing colour as the sun rose. It was beautiful. 

view from Peak Rest at Idalgashinne Sri Lanka
view from garden of Peak Rest at Idalgashinne
photograph :  RosheyFotografie

It was worth the wake at 530 in the morning to catch the sunrise. The mountains were gloriously blue. I call them the Blue mountains of Haputale.

If you do make a little trip to Sri Lanka do remember to just take the train or hike along the tracks to Idalgashinne. 

Floating

Float away like a featherweight person into the thin air like a rocket
Gone away in to the into space and floating away like a water bubble

Fly away with me into the unknown into the supermassive black-hole
No will know that am just floating away in some other universe

Just floating … floating… floating

Take me places take me somewhere only we know somewhere in space
Places out of time and space and none of life that I know
Fly away with me into the universes light years away

Just floating… floating… Floating…

I’d listen to all my favourite songs of old up there somewhere we belong
I hope my music player does work so long in time and space
Fly away with me in to the stars and galaxies that shine so bright

Just floating.. floating.. floating…

So high!

Is it a good thing or a bad thing

To climb every mountain my eyes behold
To fill up my lungs with the air on top
Bask in the clouds above the peaks
Feel the cool breeze passing by
Just chilax and click some frames

This is me just at this place called this “Worlds End”
Horton Plains in Sri Lanka my favourite place
I could just live here till my dying day
Watch the sun moon stars and clouds so high!

Photograph by :RosheYfotografie

Facing Reality

So, I was inspired to write something after watching the movie – Girls Trip (2017)

Its all about the blings of life that makes us forget the real people who are there for us –  when we need someone the most!

Some friends will stick by you through the thick and thin whilst others for the fame
Facing reality in life is so much easier when you first learn to accept lifes’ game

Facing reality the raw and ugly truth is mostly always such a pain
Yet, it will save you a lot of tears and heartbreak and stregth gain

Learn not to live in self denial and petty love over others hearts
First love yourself a bit more before you go loving others hearts

Speak up at the right time before its too late to be heard
Its your own life that needs to be saved and not be marred

Its pointless comtemplating on putting new wine in old wine skin
Learn to move on and seize the moment, only for the moment and the moment’s gone

Be yourself and don’t go changing who you are
Whole universe will have, had and will have just “one you”!

 

Photograph: Pexles

“If I” Vs “I will”

There have been many instances where I have used the word “if” when speaking of lifes moments and regrets. Everyone has regrets in life. That’s what makes human is it not?

So I have decided that I would not use ‘if’ anymore and instead use ‘ I will’

I will learn to swim – yes to many this may be a way of life, but call me crazy being an islander I could not still tread deep waters for too long.

I will write my book –  this has been a deep passion in my heart wanting to tell my story to the world, a form of a testament to my existence. I haven’t yet decided whether I should combine fiction into it

I will fly in to Space – my childhood dream of being an astronaut, a distant dream as I grow older and realize I need to be an American to join NASA!

I will open up the little cafe / studio –  I fancied myself being a waitress (sounds silly to many) but what I find it comforting, almost soul food to be able to serve someone breakfast and coffee and just say good morning and how are you?

I will own those plots of land wherever my heart desires to have small getaways for friends and strangers alike –  where they would find rest and inspiration. A place of serenity.

I will!

RosheyFotografie
Feet with big dreams

Photograph : RosheYFotografie

September

Its another September of another year and it makes me think of Septembers of 1988, 1998 and 2008. How time has flown by! Now its 2018, several decades gone by but September still remains.

I’ve always associated September with love, new beginnings, and the color September dawn – this is the time of the year that I always look forward to watch the fiery sunsets of red and pink skies in the little island where I call home.

Watching these sunsets and colors in the evening skies just makes my heart overwhelm with such joy love and laughter!

September, you bring out the best of me this time of the year. You make me smile; you make me laugh for no real reason.

September, you make me gaze at what you behold in your time the seasons and times only you can bring to my life

September, I love you for the fond memories of years gone by and the best ones yet to unravel.

Give me hope, September! Give me hope!

My Restless Brain

It’s one of those days of the week where my brain just runs wild

With thoughts, ideas, reviews, people, images and imaginations

It’s an outburst of somethings which never seems to end – a song that never stops

A movie which keeps rolling – wanting to learn a language or play the bass

All kinds of things and musings in my poor restless brain!

 

My brain is filled with stories untold, songs unsung, music never played

The mental notes just keep playing its tunes over and over again

I close my eyes hoping to silence my mind and make my brain stop

Calm myself and take a few deep slow breaths – hoping to slow down

But its just another day in my restless brain!

 

I know not what to do with my restless brain at times like these

Unless to just let it exhaust itself to boredom and tiredness

And then again when I take a breath and think its all over

Here goes, all over again my restless brain!

My Urban Life

“Where do broken wings go –  to only places they know..”
(to the tune of where do broken hearts go)

Ooops, sorry did you think I had actual broken wings?
Certainly not! fine wings I have just trying to sing a song
I heard play in this little apartment I’ve made home
These are the bestest humans in the world I must say

They feed me and don’t mind sunbathing in their flowerpots
Once in a while inside their home I do take some strolls
And Oh! they also switch off the ceiling fans when I am around
What a life-  Just a blissful one – My Urban Life!

 

A brief walk through the brief

For those who are unfamiliar with my island nation Sri Lanka, we are geographically situated in the Indian ocean just a bit below India. And no, we are not part of India (Indian friends please don’t take any offense), we are a nation of our own with rich heritage and vibrant culture, predominantly with Buddhists and minorities of Hindus, Catholics, Christians and Islamist.

This poem is dedicated to Bevis Bawa and his garden the brief

Here we were on a typical family holiday with family
In Bentota the coastal sun kissed Southern Sri Lanka
I was bored of resting which is normal and usual

“Hey lets go see some places around us would you be keen?”
I threw a question at my poor husband who was resting
“Yes sure, you decide and let me know while I close my eyes” he said

Thank you googlemaps what will we do without you
I saw something that caught my eye called “The Brief”
Curiosity killed the cat they say but not for me
Investigating for online reviews I got all thrilled

So it was a drive for less than an hour by car
Lo and behold! we reached the narrow road not far
A winding driveway with fields of Rubber afar

The little path leading to the entry point was smashing
With all these tall palm trees on either side swaying
The lush varieties of greens so warmly rewarding

A man stood by the doorway with the tickets we needed
Not through the door which he came out but gate he pleaded
It was indeed another world when once the gate was opened

Trees of all kinds of colour,foilage and blossoms
A tropical jungle with a narrow winding path going places
My eyes were serenading at its beauty with glances
“Jungle Book” I remembered from reviews online

The smells of all kinds of leaves and flowers
A jungle with trees so tall, no sun at times
We felt like little children let loose
Discovering and wandering all sorts of pathways

There are little secret pathways to wander off
Choose to leave the main path you’ll miss thereof
The strange surprise that awaits for you whereof
A beautifully landscaped garden hereof

The distant hills and plantations from the front
A majestic house sits on the highest in the back
Sway around and let the panoramic view embrace you
To me twas a tiered green cake with an icing house on top

Take a brief walk through the brief
Built by Bevis Bawa the man himself
A walk through the house you will discover
Why the “The Brief” was called the ” The Brief”

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Photographs by : RosheY Fotografie

Bird’s-eye View

 

Hey you creatures! we were there before you

And look at you now just ruling in rage over us

Less clean water, barely a good catch for us

no thanks humans! a pollutant I call you

 

My view is fine from right where I am

Gathering some Intel with a bird’s-eye view

Little do they know we are watching them

Chief Intelligence Officer, that’s who I am

 

Mental notes I make of all your vices

Draw them up in boardroom we gather

Earth will not be destroyed of your vices

We will retaliate against you together

 

 

Music of the Night

The sun just kissed the ocean saying “goodnight!”
It’s the end of another day

Darkness as we know it invades the earth again
It’s the beginning of another night

Flowers have faded; birds are nestling.
The moon and stars take their place for all of earth to see.

Suddenly everything becomes calm and serene
The dancing waves crash quietly against the sleepy rocks.

Busy streets are going to rest with hopes of another day
The night -owls heads on to the streets; they’ve been waiting all day

Can you hear someone calling out your name?
“Come, my sweet darling, draw closer to me”
Your voice makes my soul take wings
Music of the night – come stay with me

Aerials

An extra terrestrial wandering my journey here on earth

Something from above to be so entwined with  things above

Life from above always a better view than from the ground

Looking up above day or night into the starry blue skies

I feel at home yeah! though home is far away from me

 

This earth in all its beauty and magnificence I adore

May only be seen and adored from right up there

Distant sounds and miniature beings moving about

What a sight! such a  delight a rush of blood to my eyes

 

Oh give me a home hundred something up in the skies

Where once in a while a cloud or two just breezes by

I’d have a pelican or two  fly by me and say hello

All things aerial one step closer to my celestial dreams

High up in the skies and beyond in places I dream to live

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Imagine Fall

Photo by Vali S. from Pexels

 

So whats with me and fall, I’ll tell you why

I aint livin in a country where we have fall

In fact we don’t even have four seasons

Just the monsoons, dry and wet weather

 

I’ve read too many books that describes fall

The colors that is what got me thinking imagine fall

Oh! the photographs of all sorts on google and all

Just would not let me stop thinking about fall

 

I long to be in a land where there is fall

To see the colors in all its splendor and all

I do not know what to expect at real fall

But I know it will be a blast than to imagine fall

The Instant of everything

Thank you technology for making it possible, making it all instant

Everything is needed, provided and indulged in the instant

Work or play, even in the rest everything is indeed instant

Instant sleep, meetings, meals, deadlines, workouts and all sorts

The instant of everything

 

Blink of an eye, in a heart beat, flashest of the flashests

You see it, you want it, you’ve got it alright

Where oh! where arethe days of the not so instant

Timeless moments with no care in the world

Oh! how I miss the non-instant days of life

The not- so- instant of everything

 

Missing myself

I didn’t know what I was going to miss when I desired of getting back into the Corporate lifestyle with a desk job. Its been a little over a year and I cannot help but think to myself of the things I miss doing the most away from this all.

I miss watching flowers bloom, the dust in my fingers, planting something or the other. Photographing insects on plants, bugs and snails and other slimy things on plants. Butterflies and caterpillars on the citrus trees. I miss inspecting their ways and keeping myself fascinated.

I miss find my corners in all sorts of places to just indulge in a good read. An actual book that has pages to flip and bookmarks to include. I do miss that.

I miss experimenting ingredients and trying to make a dish I’ve tasted in Turkey or in England. Baking cakes and little things the way I like it. The sweetness to my taste and not as per the recipe.

I miss spending time learning to play a new song on the piano or the guitar. Some new tune in my head on to my fingers and then record it so I won’t forget them.

I miss writing sweet notes of surprises to the one I love and leaving them only to be found by him alone. And then enjoying the innocence in his smile when he finds them.

I miss my little time and space with my handwork. My little DIY projects sometimes gets messy but I do miss them.

I miss travelling places, meeting people, eating and drinking and treating my taste buds. I miss not being able to travel like before. Its what they say. When you have time you don’t have money and when you have money you don’t have time.

How I wish and pray for the life I once knew; full of laughter life and love!  My true identity of being who I am –  I miss myself.

 

In my world

photo by : @rosheyfotografie

 

In my world all things I wish for would be true

No poverty, homeless people on the streets

I’d not know what plastic or synthetic materiel

Every child will be well fed loved and educated

The skies will turn into all kinds of hues of colors

The oceans will have much more living in them

The trees and grass will have more colors than green

And there’d be apples of blue white and purple

There won’t be time and space for sadness and tears

Only laughter and joy resounding in the streets

People will love and not know hate

No racism nor division and pride

The young will respect the older

And the older will respect the young

I’d have a pelican as my pet and fly about

I’d have all kinds of seasons more than the four

Yes, this is how it will be in my world

 

On a day like today

On a day like today I’d climb a tree as tall as can be

Walk through an orchard and pick something to munch

Just walk on the beach for hours and hours sun or rain

Lay floating on a bed of water; pool or lake or sea

 

Its on a day like today that I’d like to be free and lazy

On a day like today i’d like to bake a something nice

Go out to the garden and plant something pretty

 

Just find a perfect corner somewhere and read

Pick some pencils and paper and draw my mind off

Its on a day like this that I’d really want to be out there!

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